Does Age Matter in a Relationship? – Summer Winter Romance

Dating is often a live for the moment, fun thing when we are young.  Compatibility to a teen could be liking the same music and nightclubs.  As we mature and begin looking for a life partner, compatibility takes on a whole new meaning.  Sure, we want someone who will share or at least respect our interests.  More than that though we want someone with whom we can connect and bond on an emotional level.  Someone who cares for us, understands and values us.  But what if we meet such a person and there is a ten to fifteen year or more age gap between us?

Does Age Matter in a Relationship? – Potential Issues

Statistics show that in years gone by the majority of people partnered up with someone around about their own age, give or take two to five years.  In recent times, however, this has been changing.  It’s now nothing unusual for there to be an age gap of ten to fifteen years or more, and increasingly it is the woman who is the older of the pairing.

So, does age matter in a relationship or is it how we feel that counts?  While an age difference should not be a major factor if the level of feeling and chemistry between you is right, there are some potential stumbling blocks that it’s good to be aware of.

The first thing that comes to mind may not be so much of a problem for the two of you as an embarrassment for strangers who may mistakenly think you are father and daughter or mother and son.  It’s up to you whether you correct their mistake or ignore it.  It’s really no big deal unless you make it one.  If the person making the assumption is someone you are not likely to come into contact with again, I’d let it pass.

Another possible issue is that your life experience and future goals will more than likely be quite different.  One of you may have already raised a family, met career goals, travelled extensively, etc.  This person may now be ready to slow down a bit while their other half is enthusiastically gearing up for such challenges, accomplishments and experiences.

Does Age Matter in a Relationship? – Family Matters

Something very important to take into account when pondering the question does age matter in a relationship is that one of you may have children and not want any more, while the other one has yet to start a family and is keen to do so.  If the woman is the older of the couple she may not be able to have kids/any more kids even if she wants to.  When this is the case, adoption and the possibility of surrogacy may need to be looked into.  These need to be discussed if and when things start to become serious.

Another potential issue that will probably become more obvious in time is the aging process.  The difference between the two of you may not be that obvious for many years, but if the gap is wide there could come a time that one of you is in the peak of their life while the other one is checking out retirement homes.  There is also the possibility that years down the track the role of the younger of the pairing will shift from partner/lover to partner/carer.  This can be as difficult a prospect for the older person of the two as it is for the younger.

A romantic relationship between two people of widely differing age can work if both parties communicate well, are honest about their fears and desires, are dedicated to each other and prepared to put in the effort.  Sounds pretty much like a same age relationship, don’t you think?

So, does age matter in a relationship?  I’ll leave that up to you to decide.

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Filed under: Age Gap Relationships

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